


Don't Bother Me

by HPFandom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drama, Explicit Language, F/M, Humor, Parody, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-07-09
Updated: 2007-07-09
Packaged: 2018-09-30 11:01:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10161743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPFandom_archivist/pseuds/HPFandom_archivist
Summary: It's hard to propose to the woman you love when everyone keeps bothering you. One-shot





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [HP Fandom](http://fanlore.org/wiki/HP_Fandom_\(archive\)), which was closed for health and financial reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [HP Fandom collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hpfandom/profile).

A/N The following lyrics to "Don't Bother Me' belong to George Harrison and are from the album 'With the Beatles'. All Harry Potter characters belong to J.K. Rowling. 

Since she's been gone I want no one to talk to me.  
It's not the same but I'm to blame, it's plain to see. 

So go away. Leave me alone. Don't bother me. 

I can't believe that she would leave me on my own.  
It's just not right when every night I'm on my own. 

I've got no time for you right now. Don't bother me. 

I know I'll never be the same. If I don't get her back again.  
Because I know she'll always be the only girl for me. 

But till she's here please don't come near, just stay away.  
I'll let you know when she's come home. Until that day... 

Don't come around. Leave me alone. Don't bother me. 

Draco paced the floor in the drawing room. He reached into this pocket and pulled out a crumpled letter, read it and shoved it back into his pocket. He looked at his expensive gold watch, sighed and went to the bar to pour himself a drink. "She's late!" he said, sipping his martini. 

Two weeks earlier: 

"Hermione? Where are going?" Draco asked, slamming the front door and gesturing towards her luggage in the foyer. 

"I told you, Draco! If I'm not good enough to be your wife, then I might as well leave!" 

Draco snatched the small bag from her hand and threw it. "You're not going anywhere!" 

"Get the hell out of my way, Malfoy!" 

"But you can't leave! What will I do with out you?" Draco heard himself pleading and it made him sick to his stomach. 

"I don't give two shits what you do! From now on, you're a free man. That's what you want, isn't it?" Hermione glared at him. "To be free? It must be because we've been together for five years and obviously you have no intention of ever marrying me!" 

Draco stood in front of the door, blocking her way. "Why do we have to get married? I love you, you love me. What the hell do we need some stupid ceremony for?" 

Hermione pulled out her wand. "I'm tired, Draco. Tired of wondering if I'm wasting my time with you. I deserve to be in a committed relationship. You say you love me and yet you refuse to prove it!" 

She looked at him sadly. "Now please move." 

"Where are you going?" 

"Same place I always go." She moved towards him, wand out. "And don't bother coming after me, there is nothing you can say or do now to make me come back." 

Draco wanted to grab her and lock her in a cage so that she could never leave. They had been living together for four out of the five years they had been together. Most of the time they were very happy. There had been some serious fights and she had always left and stayed at her best friend's house for a few days and then came home. This last row had been the worst, and was all his fault. 

Hermione picked up her belongings, kissed him on the cheek and said, "I hope someday you realize just what you lost today. You'll never find another woman who'll love you the way that I do." 

Defeated, he let her go, hoping that she'd come back. A week later, she was still gone and Draco began to panic. 

He flooed Harry and Ginny's house. "Sorry mate, she doesn't want to see you," Harry said, apologetically. 

"And I don't blame her!" Ginny said from over Harry's shoulder. 

Draco left the fireplace and drank an entire bottle of 100 year old scotch, alternating between crying and throwing things in a fit of rage. For three days he stayed in a drunken stupor. 

Finally Narcissa, worried about not hearing from him, decided to pay him a visit. She found him passed out on the bathroom floor, a picture of Hermione clutched in his hand. 

"Pathetic!" she said shaking her head in disgust. After filling up the tub with ice cold water, she tossed him in. 

After he screamed at the sudden cold, he looked around at her and then plunged his head under the water. When he didn't surface, Narcissa had to pull him up by the hair. 

"Why didn't you just let me drown?" he cried, trying to go back under. 

Narcissa slapped him hard across the face. He looked at her, stunned. His hand slowly and dreamlike felt the spot where her hand richoched. 

"For god's sake Draco, grow up! Now get cleaned up, shave, get dressed and meet me down stairs for breakfast!" Narcissa slammed the bathroom door behind her and went to make some very strong coffee. 

After about five cups, Draco was sober enough to discuss his problem with his mother. "I can't live without her! I have no idea what to do!" 

Narcissa, who was very wise in the ways of love, said, "Well, if you can't live without her, you know what you have to do." 

Draco looked at her with red swollen eyes. "Kill myself?" 

"No, stupid! Ask her to marry you," Narcissa said with a smile. 

Draco was flabbergasted. "I can't do that!" 

"Why, Draco? What is the big deal? What do you think is going to happen?" 

"I don't know!" he shouted. 

"You're acting like a little baby! Grown up people who are in love, get married. I don't blame Hermione for leaving! If it was me, I would have done a runner long before this!" 

Narcissa left five minutes later, Draco having told her not to bother ever coming back. 

Two days later, with still no word from her, he decided that it was time to go and get her. He apparated into the Potter's livingroom, and headed for the spare bedroom. 

"Draco! What the hell do you think you're doing?" Ginny said, catching him in the hall. She was pacing the floor, trying to soothe her crying newborn. 

"I need to see her!" 

"She's not here!" Ginny said, patting the screaming baby's back. "And even if she was, I don't think she'd see you. You've really hurt her this time and I doubt she's ever going to forgive you." 

"Is there a problem?" Harry said, coming out of the bathroom. He still had shaving cream on his face and he was naked from the waist up. "God man! You look like shit!" he said to Draco. 

"Gee, thanks Potter!" 

"Hermione's not here, she went to work about an hour ago." Harry said, gently taking the baby from Ginny. 

"Oh yeah, right," Draco sighed. "I forgot what day it was." 

"Are you all right?" Ginny asked, concerned. "Narcissa said you were drowning your sorrows... in more ways than one." 

Harry chuckled. "Trying to do a floater in the bath, huh?" The baby was now quietly sleeping. He handed it back to Ginny. "Killing yourself will only make her feel worse you know." Harry made a towel appear out of thin air and wiped his face clean. "Care to stay for tea?" 

Draco accepted, out of sheer loneliness. He and Harry had been friends for years now and often went out to play darts at the local pub. 

"I need to get her back! I'll do anything!" Draco plopped a sugar cube in his tea. "I'm desperate!" 

"Desperate enough to ask her to marry you?" Harry said, smirking. 

"Why does everyone think we need to get married? I'm perfectly happy with things the way they were!" Draco said, angrily. 

"Well you might have been happy, but clearly Hermione wasn't." Ginny said. "She loves you, Draco, I don't know why, but she does. Why can't you just do this one thing for her?" 

Draco looked at Harry, who was cleaning his glasses. "What if she says no?" 

Harry stopped in mid-swipe. "What?" 

"What if this is all a game? She does everything to make me propose and then she says no? What if she doesn't really love me and this is all a joke?" 

Ginny snorted. "That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard from you, and that's saying a lot!" 

Harry smiled in amusement. "You think she would pretend to love you for five years, make you propose and then laugh in your face? I know Hermione likes a good practical joke, but even she would never go that far!" 

"Draco, Hermione really and truly loves you, it's not a joke or a lie. She wants to be your wife, that should make you proud! Out of all the men in the entire world, she chose you." Ginny plopped a cookie into her mouth. "You have insulted her by not wanting to marry her. She thinks you are just playing house and that someday, when you get tired of playing, you're going to leave and never come back." 

"I never thought..." 

Ginny rolled her eyes. "You never do, do you?" 

Harry put his glasses back on and said wisely, "You know what the problem is with the two of you?" 

"No. What?" 

"Both of you are used to getting your own way and this time neither one of you can. Stop trying to be in control and just do what your heart tells you is right." 

"I think you've been watching to much Dr. Phill," Ginny said with a smile. 

Draco left and went back home. "Potter is right!" He went to his desk, took out a fancy piece of stationary and wrote Hermione a letter. 

My Love, 

Since you've been gone, I have realized just how much you really mean to me. Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you and what we used to have. I don't want to lose you. Please accept my invitation to dinner tonight, so that I may apologize in person. 

Yours forever,  
Draco 

So he sent off the letter with his owl and sat down to wait for a reply. It came the next day. It was short and to the point, just like her. 

Dearest Draco, 

I miss you and would be happy to have dinner with you this evening. I'll see you at 6. 

Hermione 

Draco looked at his watch again it was 6:30 and he was beginning to think she wasn't coming. He began to make himself another drink when there was a knock at the door. 

He was expecting it to be her but instead two old women were standing on the doorstep. "REPENT! The kingdom of the Lord is at hand!" 

Draco gaped at them in shock. "What?" 

"The end of the world is coming and if you're not careful, you'll be sent into the fiery pit of hell!" The little old lady with the loud voice handed him a magazine. On the cover was a picture of Muggles being consumed by flames, their faces were twisted in pain. 

Draco laughed and rolled up the tract. "Get the fuck off my property before I set the dogs on you!" He put his hand inside the door and pushed a button high up on the wall. 

The women were clearly amazed at his rudeness. "You'll be sorry young man! Only Jehovah can save you from your sins!" 

"Oh yeah? Well is he going to save you from them?" Draco said with a smirk and pointed to the five dogs that were sitting on the lawn waiting for his command. 

One woman jumped and clutched her heart, the other started to whimper. 

"Now I suggest you take your wrinkled asses off my property and never come back!" He tossed the rolled up magazine at the dogs, who tore it to shreds. The women were now pale with fright and walked slowly down the drive as the dogs followed, snarling and barking, but not biting. "I bet they won't bother me EVER again! Stupid religion peddlers!" Draco said with a chuckle. 

He called the dogs over, pet them each in turn and then commanded them to go back to the kennel. Checking his watch again, he sighed and then went back into the house. 

As soon as the door shut, the fire in the fireplace erupted and Ron stepped out of the flames. "Well? How did it go?" he asked, looking around. 

"It didn't! She never showed up!" 

Ron was confused. "But she left like an hour ago!" 

"Maybe she has another date before ours?" Draco asked, looking pathetic and angry. "I knew she wouldn't come!" 

Ron went to the bar to get a drink. 

"What do you think you're doing Weasley?" 

"Um... quenching my thirst?" 

"I really am not in the mood for company right now, so if you would mind..." 

Ron put down the empty glass. "You want me to leave?" 

"Never could see the obvious, could you Weasley? I need to be alone, so go home and stop bothering me!" 

Ron rolled his eyes. "Fine. I'll leave. Hope you have a wonderful night!" he stepped into the fireplace and went home. 

Draco sat down in the chair by the window and looked out across the gardens. As he watched the sun go down, an owl suddenly landed on the ledge. He opened the window and let the bird in. It carried a letter from his mother, wanting to know how things were going. She somehow knew about the dinner he had planned and asked if Hermione had accepted his proposal. 

"The audacity of that woman!" He wrote her back saying it was none of her business and to please stop bothering him. He sent the bird away and shut the sash. 

The Muggle telephone in the den rang. Hermione had insisted on having one so she could talk to her parents. "Hello? You have reached the Underworld, this is Hades speaking, how may I kill you?" 

"Draco?" said Harry's voice. 

"What the bloody fuck do you want, Potter?" 

"Er... Ginny wanted me to check on how things are going." 

Draco took a deep breath. "Hermione never showed up. I guess she changed her mind. And another thing, how the hell does everyone know about our dinner tonight?" 

Harry laughed. "She was very excited, so she told everyone." 

Draco frowned. "Excited? Then why would she change her mind and not show up?" 

"Don't know, mate! Haven't the slightest idea!" 

"You're no help what-so-ever, Potter! Goodbye and don't call here again!" Draco slammed the phone down. "Stupid friends of hers! Why do they always have to be all up in our business?" 

He decided to go out for dinner alone since he was already dressed. Maybe he'd meet some gorgeous creature that would burn the image of Hermione from his mind forever. 

After sitting at the best table in the restaurant, drinking an entire bottle of white wine and picking at his food, he went home. As soon as he opened the door, he knew something was amiss. First off, it was darker than a well digger's ass and the lights wouldn't come on. Second, there was some weird but very tantalizing smell in the air. 

He lit the tip of his wand and shone it towards the stairs. "Rose petals?" he whispered. He smiled and walked slowly up the stairs. 

The bedroom door was partially open and flickering light bounced off the walls in the hallway. He quietly pushed the door and looked in. There were at least a hundred white candles burning in the room and when his eyes adjusted, he saw her. 

"Hello Draco," Hermione said alluringly. She was lying on her side, naked and holding a glass of red wine. Soft romantic music was playing, some song he and Hermione had danced to a million times before. 

He shut the door silently and loosened his tie. "I thought you weren't coming," he said, suddenly feeling shy and stupid. He glanced at the table in the corner. It was set beautifully and the food looked delicious. "I'm afraid I've already eaten." 

"That's all right, lover. How about some dessert?" she said, spreading her legs and smiling. 

Draco almost drooled all over himself. "Is this some sort of trick, Hermione?" He threw off his tie, took off his jacket and undid the buttons on his crisp white shirt. "Because if it is..." 

Hermione put her glass of wine down on the nightstand. "It's not a trick, Draco. I've missed you more than you'll ever know!" She watched him take off the rest of his clothes, licking her lips in anticipation. "I've decided that maybe we shouldn't get married." 

Draco crawled on top of her. "Sure! Now that I'm about to propose to you, you suddenly change your mind!" He brushed the hair from her forehead. 

"You were going to ask me to marry you?" she said with wide eyes. 

Draco laughed. "Yes, so all this reverse psychology is really unnecessary!" he kissed her neck, making goosebumps erupt all over her body. 

Hermione ran her fingers through his long silky hair. "I thought I'd give it a try." Her hands slid from his hair and brushed the strong muscles in his arms. "I was willing to do anything to keep from loosing you." 

His hot lips descended on hers, setting her body on fire. He caressed her tongue with his, making her shiver. Her hands reached in between their entwined bodies and grasped his massive erection, causing him to moan with want and desire. 

"I love you so much," he whispered, removing her hand and kissing her fingers. 

"I love you to," she said back, wrapping her arms around his neck and bringing his lips to hers once more. 

He placed his throbbing cock at her slick entrance. "Are you certain you want to be my wife? I know I can sometimes be an asshole." He rubbed it over her clit, making her gasp. 

"I've never been more certain of anything in my life," She said, raising her hips off the bed and grabbing his ass. 

Draco slowly entered her. "Then my wife you shall be."


End file.
